Wednesday, August 18, 2004

The Asses Of Evil


It's The Economy, Stupid
"We're enjoying sluggish times, and not enjoying them very much." - George Bush Sr., in 1992"
A tax cut is really one of the anecdotes to coming out of an economic illness." - George W. Bush, in Sept. 2000

Microphones...Those Bastards!
"These, they're very dangerous. They trap you. Especially these furry ones...it's these furry guys that get you in real trouble. They can reach out and listen to something so - keep it respectful here." - George Bush Sr., speaking to Arnold Schwarzenegger in 1991 about the need to be careful when speaking near open microphones
"There's Adam Clymer, major league asshole from the New York Times." - George W. Bush, in Sept. 2000

English As A Second Language
"Fluency in English is something that I'm often not accused of." - George Bush Sr., in 1989
"The woman who knew that I had dyslexia - I never interviewed her." - George W. Bush, in Sept. 2000, denying a magazine article's claim that he suffers from dyslexia

Mistake My Wife, Please
"It has been said by some cynic, maybe it was a former president, 'If you want a friend in Washington, get a dog.' Well, we took them literally - that advice - as you know. But I didn't need that because I have Barbara Bush." - George Bush Sr., in 1989
"The most important job is not to be governor, or first lady in my case." - George W. Bush, in Jan. 2000

What I Meant To Say Was...
"For seven and a half years I've worked alongside President Reagan. We've had triumphs. Made some mistakes. We've had some sex...uh...setbacks." - George Bush Sr., in 1988
"It was just inebriating what Midland was all about then." - George W. Bush, reflecting in 1994 about growing up in Midland, Texas

International Terrorism
"When I need a little advice about Saddam Hussein, I turn to country music." - George Bush Sr., in 1991
"We cannot let terrorists and rogue nations hold this nation hostile or hold our allies hostile.'' - George W. Bush, in Aug. 2000

Imagine This
"If a frog had wings, he wouldn't hit his tail on the ground." - George Bush Sr., in 1992
"Families is where our nation finds hope, where wings take dream." - George W. Bush, in Oct.. 2000

Pass or Fail
"And let me say in conclusion, thanks for the kids. I learned an awful lot about bathtub toys - about how to work the telephone. One guy knows - several of them know their own phone numbers - preparation to go to the dentist. A lot of things I'd forgotten. So it's been a good day." - George Bush Sr., in 1992
"Rarely is the question asked: Is our children learning?" - George W. Bush, in Jan. 2000

Webster's...Who Needs It?!
"Those are two hyporhetorical questions." - George Bush Sr., in 1988
"I've got a record, a record that is conservative and a record that is compassionated." - George W. Bush, in March 2000

Huh?
"The Democrats want to ram it down my ear in a political victory." - George Bush Sr., in 1991
"We ought to make the pie higher." - George W. Bush, in Feb. 2000

These guys are funny. They're like the new Cheech & Chong right?? Anyone know where I can catch them on tour??? Oh wait that's right...These are PRESIDENTS!!!! Lincoln just rolled over.





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